My Cognitive Type Analysis

Late last year, I submitted a video for analysis to the team at I would have shared the results of my analysis sooner, but I didn’t want to attract too much attention to the site until video submissions were open again to the public. The founder of Cognitive Type (CT) was quite accommodating of the occasional wanderer who found their way into the forum or discord server, even offering the occasional complimentary analysis, but he wasn’t quite ready for the entire world ;p I also needed some time to process the results of my analysis on my own, to be sure I understood and was comfortable with my type. Having previously tried on nearly every possible Jungian-based type, sometimes changing my mind only weeks later, I needed to be relatively confident before making an announcement lest I come across as fickle yet again. lol.

It turns out, I am NeFi! Not to be confused with mbti ENFP, though it’s the same set of functions. Many of the NeFi’s in CT type as INFP in MBTI, while many FiNe’s type as INFJs (see this forum thread for an explanation). Also differentiating CT from other Jungian-based systems is development level, which refers to which functions in the stack are fully conscious. My full CT type is NeFi lll-, which means that I have the first three functions of an NeFi, Ne-Fi-Te, fully developed and explains why I typed variably as both T and F in MBTI. In CT, it is also possible to be polarized, having both first and last functions conscious and making a direct mapping over to MBTI even more impossible. The development level is not static, and can change over time, but it takes a significant change in one’s life to prompt a function to come or go from consciousness.

Here is the link to my CT analysis

Because I was analyzed as a test subject before the site went fully public, I didn’t receive the extra-detailed report that comes with CT analyses now. I’ll probably make a couple of new videos (CT analyses now require two videos) and submit them just for that report sometime in the future. For now, I’ve already spent too much money sending in videos to get most of my family typed XD

For anyone interested, there is currently a promotional price of $29.99 for an analysis. I don’t know for how much longer this will be. This price is for the first 100 submissions and I know there have already been several since it went public.


New Year, New Spiritual Practice

After leaving polytheism last summer, I’ve been in spiritual limbo. I have been busy re-building my practice, as is evident from previous posts, but I’ve been missing the actual doing of it. I haven’t done any rituals since last summer and I was finally feeling the lack. In the spirit of my New Year’s theme (progress, not perfection), I took what I have created so far and made a simple New-Year ritual out of it.

I’m pretty satisfied with what I came up with. I keep thinking it needs more, and I may add more from time to time, but I also appreciate the simplicity of it. The longer and more fancy my rituals become, the less motivated I am to do them. For now, I intend to keep this format, more or less, for regular bi-monthly rituals.

Heart of Winter Ritual

[Fill Well
Light Candle]

I have come here to recognize and celebrate the beginning of a new year, a new quarter, and a new season; and to calibrate my compass for my journey into the first season of the year. The Year is 2019 and the Season is The Heart of Winter.

I begin this rite by calling for grith,
that in grith, I may receive the voice of the universe
and it may receive mine.

At this time, I set aside my woes
which I am want to blame on all but myself
that I may take responsibility for my future
and express nought but gratitude
for the freedom and opportunities I have to do so.

As I sit before my altar,
I feel the waters support and surround me
delivering me to myself.
I feel the land extend about me
anchoring me to the physical world.
I feel the sky stretch above me
calling me to a higher purpose.

I have arrived at the sacred center,
before Fire, Well, and Tree,
where all that was is and may be meet in sacred union.
From here, I prepare myself for the work ahead of me.

I warm my heart before the sacred fire
that all I do be in love and kindness.

I cleanse my mind with water of the sacred well
that it be ever open, curious, and discerning.

I grow the sacred tree within myself,
that I might live in harmony with nature.

By Fire, Well, and Tree have I prepared myself
For the journey ahead of me, into the first quarter of the new year

As I step boldly into my future,
May the phrase “Progress, not Perfection” be my guide this year
May piano practice be my focus this quarter
And may the mini-challenges I am about to propose keep me from stagnation this season.

This Heart of Winter Season, I challenge myself to:
Try a new recipe
Enjoy a day without social media
Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts
and last but not least, slow down and appreciate the season before it is over

Before I close this rite, I would like to express my gratitude for (all things I am grateful for atm)

(Include prayers, condolences, etc. as desired)

And now, I must take my leave from Sacred Time, that I may proceed on my journey

May the Tree become once again a figurine; the Well, water, and the Fire, a flame

That I may return to the mundane, having been nourished by the sacred, its magic within me, showing me the way.

Love and Peace to All Beings!
As it was, as it is, as it evermore shall be
With the Ebb, With the Flow
Blessed Be*

nb. Rather than breaking up my year according to lunar or solar markers, I follow the Gregorian calendar, breaking it into 24 bi-monthly seasons, named according to my personal reckoning. I have found this method to feel more harmonious than attempting to juggle multiple calendars, spiritual and secular. I still keep track of the moon, and even give my own names to the lunar months (according to the term in which the full moon lands), but my primary spiritual calendar is Gregorian.

I have made a few adjustments since I last shared my 24-season calendar. Here is the updated version:

Screen Shot 2019-02-24 at 10.11.35 PM.png

* Closing words inspired by the Carmina Gadelica as modified by Ozark Pagan Mamma

A Ritual Opener

Although no longer a member of the druidic church, Ár nDraíocht Féin (ADF), I still appreciate much of ADF’s liturgy. The following is a ritual opener I have adapted from some of my older ADF rituals. Besides removing theistic references, I also replaced passive voice with active to emphasize my active role in the world.

I begin this rite by calling for grith,
that in grith, I may receive the voice of the universe
and it may receive mine.

At this time, I set aside my woes
which I am want to blame on all but myself
that I may take responsibility for my future
and express nought but gratitude
for the freedom and opportunities I have to do so.

As I sit before my altar,
I feel the waters support and surround me
delivering me to myself.
I feel the land extend about me
anchoring me to the physical world.
I feel the sky stretch above me
calling me to a higher purpose.

I have arrived at the sacred center,
before Fire, Well, and Tree,
where all that was, is, and may be meet in sacred union.
From here, I prepare myself for the day/work ahead of me.

I warm my heart before the sacred fire
that all I do be in love and kindness.

I cleanse my mind with water of the sacred well
that it be ever open, curious, and discerning.

I grow the sacred tree within myself,
that I might live in harmony with nature.

By Fire, Well, and Tree, have I prepared to (set my intentions, face my demons, face the day, celebrate, other working as desired..)

My Existential Spirituality

I’ve been deep in thought lately, deliberating over the details of my spirituality and worldview. 

Is there a natural order to the universe? a purpose? free will? fate? mind and/or body?

I do not know. I may never know. All I know is that I exist. I am an existentialist. I give meaning to my own life and experiences.

I explore all sources of potential knowledge and wisdom. I meditate to access the potential knowledge within. I explore the material world to access the knowledge without. I ponder various philosophies and their implications. I tarry a while with those that catch my fancy, but am careful not to deceive myself into accepting them as absolute truths.

I prefer to believe there is a shared objective reality, but since no one has a bird’s eye view of the universe, I can only presume that there is one based on corroborated human experience. I can transcend this presumed reality within the boundaries of my individual mind, but I have observed that getting too comfortable in the subjective leads to alienation and madness. So while I can’t be certain of what is real, I ground myself in humanity’s ostensibly objective reality for my own sanity. My mind is a playground wherein I can explore and manipulate alternate realities without fear that I will upset the external world. In so doing, I hope to come out of it better prepared to tackle problems in the external world. 

I do not believe in magic at a distance, but I do believe I can change consciousness at will. I may not have free will, but I live as though I do. Or rather, I perceive that I do. If I don’t have free will, it makes no difference what I believe so I may as well believe what I want (since this would be my belief regardless). If I do have free will, and I choose to believe that I don’t, there would be repercussions. 

I accept unexplained synchronicities at face-value, indulging in the awe of the moment without attributing to it arbitrary and unnecessary explanation – deity, fate, the power of my mind, etc. 

At the heart of my spirituality is gratitude. I may not always know to whom or what I ought to direct it, but I express it all the same. The universe is an awesome place with or without supernatural interference. I am grateful to be a part of it. I am grateful to be having this human experience. I am grateful for all the events, coincidence or otherwise, to which I attribute meaning. 

A Toast to Autumn

Autumn, born in August, Summer’s clout preeminent, finally, you come into your own. Like a young maiden presented at her debutante ball, we see you now: still young, still green, but a force with which to reckon. Summer yields to your power. This is your day, your right of passage. May you take the reins of Nature’s chariot that Summer may retreat into sweet slumber. 

Deep Time: One More Dial on my Wheel

The more I explore Naturalistic paganism, the less inclined I feel to hold onto lingering superstitions. I still enjoy speculating on the supernatural and remain agnostic, but my spirituality has found a more personally fulfilling home in natural world. If there is a supernatural world, I trust that I will learn of it in good time. Until then, I intend to embrace all that I can of the natural world while I have an Earthly body in which to do so. 

Ironically, I feel more open to spiritual experience since turning away from the supernatural. I am no longer bound by vague deity relationships, orthopraxic rules of semi-reconstructed hearth cultures, or anything save my own code of ethics. I am free to explore and experiment without fear of offending the gods. If there are gods and if they are offended, well that’s on them for being so superfluously elusive. 

With such freedom, however, comes a lack of direction. I am inspired and motivated, but a little lost all the same, so I took a break from formal ritual and Sabbat observance to sort myself out. The first thing I did was revisit my personal wheel of the year. It’s focus on micro seasons and phenology already provides me with a head start into less deity-centric practice, but there is always room for improvement. One aspect I’ve always appreciated about the cyclical observance of the year is the extent to which my observances can vary from year to year as I map the wheel onto other wheels of the greater circle of life and existence. There is so much worth celebrating and no reason to limit myself to the usual. 

Inspired by a recently renewed interest in prehistory, I’ve added cosmic and deep time to the ever increasing set of dials on my personal wheel. I am crazy excited about all the new celebratory possibilities this new dial presents to me. February is always a good time for soup in the cold Rockies, but now I can call my February Sabbat soup a primordial soup! You have no idea how amused I am by this. Or how about my fish for the Spring Equinox? I used to think salad an appropriate choice for this Sabbat, but it’s simply way too cold in March to appreciate a salad. Now I can celebrate the bursting forth of life with toasty tasty fish in recognition of the Age of Fish!  What goes better with a fresh loaf of baked bread than honey? I put honey on my August Cross-Quarter bread regardless, but now? oh boy you guys, NOW –  it’s because this Sabbat aligns with the time when the first honey bees arose. Is this not simply amazing? And oh gosh, how much fun I can have decorating my altar each new season with all these new ideas! 

For the next year, I will engage in deep contemplation of each period and epoch as they arise on my wheel. I intend for my Sabbat observances to focus on deep time while my micro season observances remain focused on local climate and phenology. At the conclusion of this year of contemplation, I will transfer my deep-time wheel to my Book of Spirit.

Cosmic and Deep Time Wheel:

Screen Shot 2018-08-21 at 8.24.43 AM.png

Micro-Season and Lunar Wheels:

Screen Shot 2018-08-21 at 8.18.15 AM.png

Note About Lunar Wheel: I name each lunar cycle according to the season in which the full moon falls; consequently, I do not use all 24 moon names each year.

I have so much yet to sort out before my spirituality finds stable ground again, but it seems I am more enthusiastic when in exploratory limbo, so there’s that….¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Taking My Paganism in a New Direction


I’ve been staring at my screen for sometime, trying to decide where I want to begin, but I can’t think of anything better than: “I am no longer a hard polytheist.” So, why didn’t I just come right out with it? Why the hesitation? I suppose it’s because I wanted to soften the blow. Not so much for you, the reader, but for myself. Because to say “I am not” is to leave a hole, which “I am” must fill in. But I don’t know what I am. And so I have been holding onto my polytheism as a child continues to hold onto a security blanket long after it’s truly needed – with a false sense of dependency. That is, until now.

After holding on for so long, I finally experienced the dreaded spiritual burnout and knew it was time to let go. So I did. I opened a text document and began just as described above. After that, and to my surprise, I felt immediately better and inspired to start anew. The hole that I feared isn’t so much a hole as it is a fresh pot of soil. I feel cleansed of all that has been holding me back, and ready to continue growing. 

As for what I am now, I suppose I am somewhat of a Naturalist Pagan and neo-Animist, but not ready to commit to any labels just yet. I trust science above all, but I have experienced so much that cannot (as of yet) be scientifically explained that I remain open to the possibility of supernatural phenomenon.  What I am giving up is not the unexplainable, or even the metaphysical, but rather, the specificity of woo-driven theistic paganism. I want science with just a dash of woo, not the other way around. 

I am still working out how much to change of my current practices to fit my new path, but I am enthusiastic to begin. Stay tuned… 

Where My Paganism Has Led Me. 


Image Credit: NASA

I started this blog while in the midst of completing my Dedicant Path work with ADF. Before joining ADF in 2015, I was an on-and-off again eclectic pagan with no formal practice, filling in the gaps with spiritually-empty agnosticism. Though my practice is now regular and structured, I am still in the process of tweaking it for the best fit. I don’t imagine this process will ever end, but perhaps the changes will become less frequent.

I have chosen a hard-polytheistic orthopraxy, but my beliefs about the divine remain agnostic. In the end, it matters not whether the gods I call on are independent beings, semi-independent beings, manifestations of my mind or archetypes. I use the language of hard polytheism regardless of which belief I am leaning more towards at any given time. Whatever the source of deity, it communicates with me and guides me along the path of self-improvement.

Upon beginning the Dedicant’s path, I was anxious to get to know all the deities of my new hearth culture (and a few from the Norse for good measure). My personal pantheon underwent several changes during the first two years until I finally felt at home with one that was more focused on celestial bodies (Sunne, Mona, Eorthe) than on anthropomorphic deities. Even the language I use to honor the sun and moon has become less anthropomorphic. I initially referred to the moon, for example, as Mona’s ward rather than as Mona himself. I wasn’t consciously aware of this development until I developed an interest in planet and star veneration outside the earth-moon-sun trio, and I realized I had already been on the path to astrolatry all along. 

My personal pantheon still includes Woden, Frigg, and my gatekeeper and first patron, Thunor. This too was an organic development for which I later understood significance. Woden and Frigg can be thought of as the archetypal God and Goddess, though I interact with them as if they are independent beings. Thunor is the one who led me onto my current path, who wards and opens the gates to the Otherworld, and whose hammer is the symbol of my faith. In other words, he symbolizes and grants access to my spirituality. It’s as if my non-theistic side worked on my behalf while I pursued hard polytheism. I am now left with a pantheon that could easily adapt to a non-theistic approach if it ever needed to.

My practice also includes veneration of nature spirits. Of all the otherworldly beings, nature spirits are the only that I’ve never struggled to believe in. I suppose this is because I am vehemently animist. The nature of deity is beyond my comprehension, but the various various manifestations of the same animistic essence that resides in us is easier to wrap my head around. The universe is alive and worthy of veneration, from the smallest unit of matter to entire galaxies.

Last, but certainly not least, are the Ancestors. I am as agnostic about the afterlife as I am about deity, but I value the wisdom preserved in the memory of a life well-lived. I honor my ancestors by recalling their lives and leaving my mind open to contact should any part of them live on in another form. I sometimes like to believe that deity is nothing more or less than the spirits (merged, independent, or something in between) of the dead. And perhaps that the nature spirits, who can be fickle and seem to live outside of our human-constructed morality, are the spirits of non-human dead. Agnosticism doesn’t keep me from speculating. 

My current practice involves dedicating to a specific deity, spirit, or related group from my pantheon each month or semi-month. When the honored being of the month is a celestial body other than the Earth, Moon, or Sun, I extract lessons that can be applied to my life from a study of its historical, mythological and scientific significance. My dedication to other beings takes a similar, but more personable approach. My motivation is always spiritual growth and self-improvement, but I approach my primary patrons with the understanding that our relationship is reciprocal and with the assumption that they are autonomous beings with agendas that may or may not have anything to do with my own. 



My Year of Divine Consciousness

I celebrate the return of the sun on the third night of Yule; that being the night following the first day that was longer than the previous day. I prefer to “confirm” that the day’s are getting longer before I rejoice. In other words, I don’t count my eggs before they hatch, as the old saying goes.

Once I have borne witness to Sunne’s renewed strength, I ask her what her return heralds for the coming year. This is the first year in which I have practiced this method of yearly-omen taking, but I plan to maintain it as a tradition going forth. I take my monthly omens from Móna (the god of the moon), so it seems appropriate to take yearly omens from Sunne.

This year, it turns out, is the year of ᚩ (Ós). Ós is the Anglo-Saxon equivalent of the Elder-Futhark ᚨ (Ansuz).

OS (The God) is the creator of all language,
widom’s fountain and consolation of sages
and every man’s joy and trust.1

After receiving the rune omen, I proceeded to come up with a theme for 2018 that embodies the essence of it. In the past, I’ve let my yearly omen set a tone for the year and act as a lens through which I interpret various events, but I’ve never actively used it to set my intentions or resolutions.

I really like the idea of a New Year’s theme in place of a resolution, so I decided to go that route this year. It took me some time and contemplation to come up with a word or, rather, a noun phrase that worked. I considered “communication”, “divine inspiration”, and “awareness”, among others, but none of these really captures the entirety of Ós. I finally settled on “divine consciousness,” having also considered higher/heightened consciousness. “Consciousness” assumes awareness and “divine” assumes a higher state of it. “Divine consciousness” reminds me that the breath of divine inspiration flows through me and that I, though not a god myself, am the result of an unbroken chain going back to the divine source. Concequently, I have access not only to the guidance of the gods, but also to that of my ancestors. My focus this year will be on developing, accessing, and learning from this state consciousness.

Because this is a theme and not a resolution, I have no objective goal to meet. I imagine it would be difficult to objectify progress in heightened states of consciousness anyway. But the theme will inform my monthly intentions, interpretation of future omens, and over all spiritual journey this coming year.  It’s going to be an awesome year!

1. From the Old English rune poem as translated by Alaric Albertson

My Morning Devotional

I never thought I would make it to the point where I write my own devotionals. But with all the druids participating in #prayeraday this month, I felt motivated try my hand at using my own words.

I begin my devotional as usual, lighting a candle as I say a Flames of Unity chant. The words I use for this are not the ones I find in most sources around the web. I first came across this chant on one of the ADF Facebook pages, but have not seen it written the same elsewhere.

I end all of my devotionals with closing words inspired by the Carmina Gadelica and as modified by Ozark Pagan Mamma:  “As it was, as it is, as it evermore shall be, with the ebb, with the flow, blessed be.” I absolutely love this closing.

Without further ado, here is my current morning devotional:

*Light Candle*

Kindled from the great flame
Kept by prudent skill
Living on our common hearth
That these flames be one!

Earth Mother, as the light of dawn brings color to your horizon once more, I greet this new day in reverence of your power and beauty. I thank you for your support in this rite as in all things. Hail to you Great Mother!

By the fire of the gods,
May my spirit be kindled
That I might follow a virtuous path towards enlightenment.

By the deep waters of the Ancestors,
May my mind be asperged
That I might receive the wisdom of those who have gone before.

By the sacred tree of the cosmos,
May my body be rooted
That I might be as one with the spirits of land, sea, and sky. *

By Fire, Well, and Sacred tree,
I send my love, thanks, and devotion to the Kindreds Three!
May I navigate this day with Their guidance and be worthy of Their blessings.

Love and Peace to all beings!
As it was, as it is, as it evermore shall be
With the ebb, with the flow,

Blessed be.

*at this point, I will ask via pendulum if any of the Kindreds have a message for me that day. I will then draw an omen (or omens) accordingly. I always take omen during major rites, but I think it is overkill to expect a message every single day. Asking if there is a message for me in advance helps to reduce the static that often accompanies daily omen-taking.

Feel free to use and modify this rite for personal use. Please give credit when sharing publicly.


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