Time and Money and Life

Somehow I’ve managed to arrange my life such that I feel as if I have less available time than when I was in grad school. How is this possible? #timeywimeywibblywobblystuff.

I’m trying my best to prioritize the most important of my personal interests and activities. That includes piano practice, meditation, gardening, and my YouTube challenge videos. In addition to my Dedicant path work, I have assignments for the Kitchen Witchery course in which I am enrolled. I am paying for this, so that’s motivation enough to keep up. I’m a bit disappointed in myself for taking nearly a month to complete the first assignment when two weeks is the recommended time to spend on each. In my defense, though, energy work was a tough topic to start out with.

I am working part time too. A job I plan to quit as soon as my husband gets a better job. I am hoping very much that this occurs before October, because somewhere in my daily schedule I need to fit in serious preparation time for my Etsy store. I need to brush up my skills in crafts I haven’t pursued in years. Namely, leather craft. I used to be pretty good at it. Of course, I also wasn’t half bad at drawing back in the day either – but I fear that starting again won’t be quite like riding a bike. I want to sell hand carved leather journals (and/or journal covers among a few other things) and although my amateur work I was the talk of my high school so very long ago, I am sure that a marketable item will require better than high-school level skills. I have my tools, acquired a new marble slab since my father lost my old one (the one he regularly reminded me of every time he found it in the garage but can’t find now that I want it) and I have some dinky little kits and leather to practice with. But time, I can’t find time 😦 I’d like a good solid month or two to just practice and get an idea for exactly what I’ll be putting up for sale in the long run. I can’t do much more than practice for the time being anyway since I have absolutely no spare money to buy the supplies I need. Eventually, if not sooner, I’d like to look into my options for the most and eco friendly and humanely acquired (from happy and organically raised cattle) leather and I do not expect this to be a cheap option.

I started out this year really excited about my plans, but it’s starting to look like nothing is going to really get rolling until the end of the year at best. My divinations really weren’t kidding about this being my time-of-waiting. I’m doing my best to use my waiting time wisely. Lots and lots of planning. This way, when I am finally in a position to start, I’ll be able to do so efficiently. Besides my store, I also want to start an ASMR channel. I think I said this before, but my current youtube channel was to be preparation for this (practice, confidence-building, etc). I didn’t expect to get many, if any subscribers on my current channel, but people are subscribing (and I am very very happy for this). But this also means TheAspiePagan may turn into a bigger and longer-term project than I thought.

Speaking of my channel, I’ve uploaded some more videos since I last posted:

YouTube Pagen Challenge Week 9 (Journals)

YouTube Pagan Challenge Week 10 (Moon Phases)

YouTube Pagan Challenge Week 11 (The Sun)

ADF-style Charming of the Plough Ritual.

But back to my time issues: there’s the especially big problem I have with sitting down (or getting up) to do one thing and spending the next hour doing something completely different. I do this all. the. time. This very blog post is one such case. I sat down to write about gatekeepers in ADF ritual and ended up writing this instead. But, hey, it’s still a blog entry, so that’s something.

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Posted on March 14, 2016, in Whatever (Musings, Rants, Daily Life) and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. What you are describing sounds like a chemical impediment of the executive functions of the prefrontal cortex, probably brought about by a persistent low-level depression, or dysthymia. HTH

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    • You got all of that from one relatively short blog post? 😮 meh, I know I sound mopey sometimes, but I’m way to much of a trooper to claim anything as melodramatic as depression.

      Liked by 1 person

      • No, actually. My synopsis of your current chemical state is a combined function of Both my metaphysical predilections as well as my reading comprehension. More the former than the latter in your particular case. Not every malaise a person suffers from is spiritual in nature, and I tend toward being matter-of-fact in either case.

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      • Depression isn’t melodramatic at all. It’s…life-suckingly boring. I’ve been through a few bouts of it.

        But honestly, what you describe in this post sounds a lot like what I file away under “neurodivergency sh!t” I do exactly the same stuff all the time. Starting stuff and not finishing, procrastinating, meaning to do stuff and never doing it, starting something and getting distracted…

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      • Oh I was describing my character more than depression itself. I am not one to let people know if I so much as have a headache. A situation mental or physical has to be pretty serious before I’ll consider applying it to myself publicly. My persona is not melodramatic enough to claim maladies in general. Depression in and of itself is a serious condition with or without melodramatic associations 🙂

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  2. Things I wonder all the time lately.

    Liked by 1 person

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